There's a reason why some of us who grew up in the '90s didn't turn out to be methheads, crackwhores, stoners, juiced and/or wired on caffeine pills and that reason...is TNBC. Every Saturday morning we'd tune into Saved by the Bell and California Dreams (and Garfield & Friends...but I still haven't exactly sorted out what we learned there and I quite possibly never will) to see what those crazy kids at Bayside High and PCH were getting themselves up to and sometimes (duh, duh, duuuuh)...it was no good. With the aid of fine acting skills and pretty people, we were able to see the nasty, spastic, life-altering effects of drugs or the consequences of not keeping your word, so on and so forth. Thank you broadcast television...now I just booze. You liiiiike mashing up videos? You too can do so, right here.
1. No Hope With Dope - Saved by the Bell. Johnny Dakota seemed like the teen dream until Zack Morris discovered he was smokin' the reefer. I never forgot just how dumb, stupid, crazy, dangerous, and 'stinks' dope really is...granted Dazed and Confused really undid a lot of the good TNBC was shooting for.
2. Tiffany & Steroids - California Dreams. Wow. I'm surprised Peter Engel let California Dreams take this one right out of the pages of SBTB. Kudos to Kelly Packard but she couldn't quite sell the crazy like Elizabeth Berkeley. That aside, I never took steroids so score one for the war on drugs.
3. Get Out of my School, Rod - Saved by the Bell. From the episode that stemmed the famous quote, "Two Beldings in one building, one of whom is balding" - sure the younger, hipper Belding seemed to be a fun-loving good guy, but the irresponsibility and selfishness Rod showed us when he chose a wicked hottie over the kids truly showed us what we respect in our authority figures - two points for stiffs everywhere.
4. Jake Quits Smoking - California Dreams. Well this one went like clockwork. Jake tries to quit, Jake tries gum...hmmmmJake doesn't like gum, Jake CAN'T quit, Jake's role model finds out he has lung cancer, Jake cries. Ugh the heartstrings...
5. Driving is a Big Responsibility - Saved by the Bell. Zack didn't take Drivers Ed seriously enough causing Kelly to hit her head. Noted. Pop Quiz: AC stands for two different things, what are they?
6. Caffeine Pills are Scary and make you a bad actor - Saved by the Bell. The mother of all thinly-veiled PSAs. Changing the face of a Pointer Sisters classic forever. Throwing the dregs of addiction in our little pre-teen faces. A little taste of what was to come...and that is Showgirls.
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